Loves me not!!!

Loves me not!!!

Like cold to ice
Your lies cling to my mind eyes
The weight of it slowly drowning my strength
Taking my every breathe
Obvious but I choose to ignore
The uncertainty of our victory in this war
In this battle with fears
I shed blood as transparent as tears

You’re supposed to be my hassock
Whist praying you become sharp sand to my knees causing havoc
With you I’m meant to be happy
To you, I’m more of a harpy
I hear the tocsin in my head
But its hard to get out of your bed
I hang onto consciousness by sheer force of will
I’m not sure I still have my freewill
I’m in another realm of reality
My only god being my sanity

Starring at you right now,
I feel like i’m your clown
Making your life comically entertaining
You are enjoying the show; its great and you are laughing
But inside you have a side attraction
Not a distraction but a deliberation
Intentionally hurting everything beneath my skin
Taking me diving when you know I can’t swim
Using my vulnerability as a weapon against me
Making this game unbearable for people like me
I weep and yearn for your heart
But you’re giving me hurt
To you I’m stupid in this; an experiment
Could be cause I care too much or may be my temperament

Right now, pouring out my soul
I take back what from me you stole
My heat, my sanity, my tears, my will
My mind, my thoughts, my flower even still
Though almost in disbelief myself,
I choose to treat me better than yourself
I refuse to be your amusement
Your light in this dark basement

Today, I become immortal to your curse
Immune to your charm of course
Decisive on what I do with my heart
Never letting your kind to again rip apart
You’re no longer my comet across night
No longer my obsession or delight
You’re no more the wine of passion I drink
You’re the bittersweet drop I think
You’re my sickness
The cure I now have, God is my witness

This very moment; I say you’re all I’m not
You’re that last leaf on my clover that falls down on “he loves me not”
And I throw you back to the ocean that swept you to my shore
At last freed for sure.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s